Due to scheduling, I can't make WW today. So I have to miss a week. Probably not a bad thing. I didn't eat out hardly at all other than like Subway. But we BBQ'd this weekend and try as I might, I could not keep to 4 oz of meat. That was pretty much all I ate. I can pass up beans and potato salad easily. But steak? No way. So I tried to at least have smaller pieces of everything which included chicken breasts, steak and ham. =/ Well at least I got my protein in.

I didn't track hardly at all over the weekend. Kinda had a case of "I don't give a shit" going on. It comes and goes. And I have to try to fight it every day. Every friggin day.

When I'm watching what I eat, I feel better. I look better. My hair even looks better. My GERD goes away almost completely. So why is it so hard to want that every day? No, I'd rather feel like crap, look like crap than give up eating lasagna or cheeseburgers? How dumb is that? But it's true. It has been true my whole life.

Just gotta keep telling myself, "not this time" and hang in there.

But most of all, I want to lose weight so I can tell the ass I work with who doesn't like bigger people to kiss MY ass once he starts being nicer to me when I get thinner.